Tuesday, February 14, 2012

A Single Guy’s Cynical Valentine’s Day Poem


[I]
Among other things,
Condom sales reach their peak
Around Valentine’s Day.
…so have fun with that. :(

[II]
Have fun?  Great!  Because
March is the highest grossing month
For at-home pregnancy tests.
So have fun with that :)

[III]
Oh, and on Valentine’s Day, 1929,
Penicillin was introduced
To cure you of your syphilis.
Try to have fun with that! <3

-Youngman Brown

 

9 comments:

  1. Crabs-riddled beatnik snaps for your fresh lyrics.

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  2. Hilarious!

    I'm not single, but I'm not a huge fan of Valentine's Day either..

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  3. I like to remind my friends with November birthdays that it was probably on Valentines day that the magic happened...

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  4. Hmm! Is it a coincidence that the initials for Valentines Day are V.D.?? :o

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  5. Definitely not a coincidence. Ask the Illuminati.

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  6. Awesome :).



    Did you check I give you a butterfly blogger award ?

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  7. @G my birthday is the 2nd week of November, and that just blew my freaking mind.

    Oh, and as a married guy, I have no need for condoms, pregnancy tests, OR syphilis! Score!

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  8. SO glad to have survived another relationship-free VD! ...wait, that sounds bad. ...but I can't bring myself to spell out the actually holiday.

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  9. izdiher: yes! thank you, I will probably make a post about that soon!

    aBftS: yay for marriage

    Red: Yea it is a tough one to spell out if you are bitter.

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When you comment, I vibrate.