The car itself is a powerful tool. It is this tiny capsule that takes me places. Moreover, it is a bubble that allows me to be more significant and my actions to be more substantial.
For example, giving people the finger in the car is the only time I feel as if it is really actually giving them the finger. It is saying “Hey man, fuck you,” as opposed to just giving it as a joke to one of my friends. Additionally, giving the finger is such a rare occurrence for me that if I give it to you, you can be damn sure that you are very low on the Good Driver Hierarchy.
- It is important to really time it right so that they cannot see your face.
- You will need to lean forward and really reach toward them, and wave frantically, as if you are both surprised and ecstatic that you happened to see them on your commute.
- The honk itself needs to be two honks, making sure not to hold on for too long. If it comes out honk honk, you are doing it wrong. You should be aiming for more of a hink hink!
Do everything I said and you are going to be witnessing a very confused pedestrian in your rear-view mirror who, from my experience, will wave back half the time.