I don't really get semicolons.
I'm not sure if I simply happened to miss out on all of the lessons in school about the semicolon (much like my sister missed all of the lessons on how to spell the word "neck"), or if I'm just really, really dumb. But either way, I simply don't feel comfortable enough with semicolons to actually use them.
But I do want to flirt with this girl, imaginary as she might be.
Because if used at the wrong time, the ;) can be eerie and disturbing. The dreaded semicolon strikes again, turning an innocent smiley-face into the face of a creepy stalker -- one who has seemingly been watching this particular woman from afar for years and knows exactly how cute she is when she is angry*.