Somewhere in the Bible,
It surely must say:
The coming of the Antichrist
Shall be revealed on Leap Day.
|God help us all.|
|Did you even know there was a third Manning?|
I got another award.
|Zak Bagans and the boys, ready to beat the SHIT outta Casper.|
|Look closely. You can see the sadness.|
I can’t cook.
This is a fact that is true, not because I am unskilled in the kitchen, but mostly due to the fact that I am lazy and never really try to cook.
Here are the only things I have ever used the stove or oven for:
The other night, I pulled up to a gas station, rolled down my window, turned off my car, and popped open my gas tank.
Nobody came to help me.
I leaned out the window and looked behind me to see a kid doing something on his cell phone with his back to me. He was within the warm confines of that little booth where the gas-pumpers sit when there are no cars to be fueled.
Notice that I said, when there are NO cars.
I had driven directly by him, so he undoubtedly knew that I was there.
|Where is all this traffic coming from?|
I took off of work on Super Bowl Sunday, of course. I am going to eat glorious amounts of terrible food, of course. And I bought a bunch of beer to drink. Of course.